Christmas gifts

Now I know it's not quite Christmas yet, but that doesn't mean I haven't been on the receiving end already.

This past week my little family has been plagued with all kinds of coughs. Good news is that they are all getting better but because we've been dealing with sickness while with family this Holiday, Jason and I haven't slept well. We finally decided to go home early so that we can rest easy and get some good sleep. Roads were thankfully clear and no accidents happened. 1st gift, safety! :) Our boys are returning to their normal selves before they were sick so just a few more days and hopefully everything will be cleared up. My sweet husband has let me take naps to catch up on missed sleep while he takes care of the little ones. 2nd gift, caring husband (although that hasn't changed since I met him, he's wonderful to me)! 3rd, sleep!

I was holding my baby boy, although not much of a baby anymore, he's crawling and jabbers quite a bit when he's super happy. I was remembering how last year I learned I was to be a mother of 3 darling boys. I am so happy for having my children with Jason and I as we progress in our life together. 4th, my family!

But there is a Christmas gift that I don't want to go into a lot of detail about receiving because it super special to me. It is an incredible, wondrous experience that I will get to have with Jason in a few months. I found out last night and I was so happy that I was shaking.

Last night my little family and I ate dinner, enjoyed hot chocolate and watched "The Santa Clause", tonight we will bake cookies, have the children unwrap their first gifts, sing carols, and read of the reason we celebrate Christmas. The story of Christ's birth.

I hope everyone stays safe, and has a very Merry Christmas!!! :)

RS Christmas Party

Last Thursday, we had our ward's RS (Relief Society) Christmas Party. It was beautiful!! Yummy food, awesome friends and company, and a wonderful message of Christ's birth. There was also some musical numbers. . . . I happened to participate in one of them. Let me tell you, I love love LOVE to SING!!!

But in front of others? Not in a big group? It does become more difficult for me. My nervousness increases and I'm bound to make more mistakes. Lots more than when I'm singing in a group of 5 or more. I rarely ever do solos. Duets I can handle a little more because there is another voice besides my own. But depending on the song, sometimes it is just my own voice for a little bit. A lady in my ward who I don't know very well got paired up with me, we decided to sing a beautiful arrangement of "Still, Still, Still", if you have never heard it before, I urge you to listen to it. This song wasn't so difficult with the words and a bit of the tune as I have sung it before when I was in the Institute Choir at SLCC called Sounding Joy. But with it being only a 2 part, SA, it was different. I had to work hard to get the notes and rhythms right.

The night of the Christmas party I was a bundle of nerves and was terrified of messing up. The sweet lady who was singing with me, told me I would be fine and told me she had prayed for me!! I was amazed that she had done that for me!! I felt horrible to realize I had not prayed for help either on me singing my part, or to help me calm down, or I didn't think about praying for her or our accompanist.  She and another friend helped me run through my trouble spot in the song and calmed me down. We ended up doing fantastic, I still made mistakes, but continued on anyway without sounding too bad. The end of the night, I thought about what we had just done. Sharing our talents with others. Even though it scares the crap out of me to do something like that, I had been given this gift for a reason and not sharing it wouldn't be a kind thing to do for my Heavenly Father who had given it to me.

Wanted to share this video with you that I watched that night. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PrLoWt2tfqg

Being thankful for the big and small

Sometimes we take things for granted, and then when Thanksgiving comes, we start naming things we're grateful for which is fantastic! 

But we should be grateful for things year round.

Also when we think of things that we're thankful for, do you think about the little things too? You can list family, friends, and stuff around you but what about the very specific stuff?

I know I am so thankful for Jason's gift of languages, mostly Spanish, as that is how we connected. I'm thankful for his patience with me, his love for me, and forever thankful that he rescued me in the darkest time of my life. I'm thankful for his love of music, which we constantly bring up and 'argue' who loves music more. I'm also thankful for my boys, each one of their smiles, and the sound of their laughter. The fact that no one has been jealous when a new sibling comes into the family is a complete blessing. 

Those are just a few things that I'm thankful for my little Wilbermen family. 

I'm also thankful for my angel mother. She has and is one of my bestest friends ever!! She has supported me and been there for me when others have not. We hardly fought in my years growing up with her and I've always looked up to her. I'm thankful for her kindness, and love of music. I'm thankful for her goofiness, as she taught me it is ok to be silly, all of which she learned from her mother. But the most important thing she taught me, is that I am a daughter of God and and to love the gospel. 

I am thankful for all my friends, for a reason or another. There are too many wonderful friends to try to name them all or what they've done. But just know that I have been extremely blessed to have true friends who care and have/still do help me. 

I am also thankful for warm water. :)

Music.

Sports.

Sunrises and sunsets.

Waterfalls.

When it is raining and there are puddles for me to jump in. :)

Flowers.

When strangers do kind things for each other.

For all my senses.

My health.

Animals, more specifically, horses and dogs. :)

The color blue!! lol.

The ability to go to school.

Books.

Milk and cookies.

Being a stay at home mom!!!!

I could go on and on, but I dunno if you would really be interested. :) If there is one thing that you really need to know I am thankful for, it would be this.

None of this would be possible without Jesus Christ, our older brother, Savior and Redeemer and our Heavenly Father and his wondrous and perfect plan. I know I will be able to live with my loved ones after death if I am doing my best and repent from my sins. I am sealed to Jason for all eternity because we got married in the temple. Life would be unbearable without the knowlege that I have. I am so happy! My life is far from perfect and easy, but I am happy! I love my family and our adventures in everyday life. Remember to be thankful, but also to be grateful. Show your gratitude and be happy. :)

Busy busy me

I feel like these past months have flown by so fast! Almost 3 months since my last post. But with moving to a new place and lots of cleaning, than unpacking and making a new mess just to get settled into our new home with 3 kids . . . I think it's understandable, at least to me. :)

We love our new ward! It's close to one of our favorite wards of all time. We also love our new home! It's the closest we've ever come to the feeling of home. Alyx was in his first primary program and made me cry a little. He was so adorable! Alyx started going to some Zumba junior dance classes which he loves! I have also tried out Zumba and love LOVE it as well! I started going to some awesome workout classes with a new awesome friend of mine every week and it has helped the athlete in me. Now if only I was in a regular choir again for the musician part of me. :)

This year for Halloween, we did a Peter Pan theme. 

Jason - Peter Pan

Myself - Wendy

Alyx - Captain Hook

William - Smee

Vincent - the awesome crocodile! 

Jason surprised me with a dozen red roses as he and I celebrated our 5 and a half years of being married. Vincent is 6 months now and had a great first cc cookie eating experience. :) Jason and I FINALLY were asked to give a talk in sacrament meeting, our 1st talk as husband and wife. We talked on "How to deal with tribulation". I was incredibly nervous and unsure of myself but I did my best to rely on the Holy Ghost and it seemed that from what people said, that I actually was able to help someone. Jason, of course, did amazing and was calm and delivered a powerful talk. A week ago we had to get a special helmet for Vincent's head to help re-shape it. He is super cute, helmet, or no helmet. :) Vincent also had his first tooth break through and experienced snow for the first time. I've been trying once in a while to help Alyx and William learn Spanish and I think it's starting to sink in. Alyx loves singing the Spanish color song and has been asking for 'agua' several times each week. I've been searching on Pinterest (LOVE that site) for free worksheets and activities to help Alyx and William learn things that would be taught in Preschool or Kindergarten. 

Alyx is super excited for Christmas to come and I have to keep reminding him Thanksgiving needs to come first. I am looking forward to seeing family and friends next week. There are lots of people that I miss seeing and it sucks we have to be so far away. :( I look forward to the day we will get a second car and I can drive more with the  boys to see people I love and be more free instead of staying inside the house all the time. 

It's hard to talk about everything that has happened that's important to me, or my thoughts and feelings with everything that is going on in the world, or my life. But as far as catching up goes, I think I did pretty well for now. I'll get back to writing more often again. 

Living my life by Faith

This past month has been filled with anxiety, worry and frustration. Ups and downs as explained by my last post. But I'm happy to report that our prayers have been answered and we are quite happy and excited. :) Jason is not jobless and we are not homeless.

It made us worry, after what happened with Alabama, about what we would do with our little family. Needing to find a new place to live and not having a job potentially took a leap of faith. We constantly reminded each other to have faith and that everything would work out. There was a day when I wasn't at my best or even in a good mood and I was super stressed. The boys were happy and content at the moment and Jason turned some music on his phone and took me in his arms and started leading me in a dance. That made me smile and laugh. The older boys stopped what they were doing and watched their mommy and daddy danced and smiled. I was super grateful for Jason helping me out of the pit of misery I was in.

Each day and night we prayed as a family, couple and in our individual prayers to figure out what we needed to do. Where we needed to go to live. We did our best to choose the right, and to listen to the promptings of the Holy Ghost.

About a week and a half ago, Jason received an email from a Professor at BYU who told Jason that room had been made for some new classes to be opened and meant Jason would be able to teach this fall. We were thrilled!! Not long after that we were able to put a deposit down for a new home that was actually pretty close to what we needed and wanted.

There's a quote that has been one of my favorites that I try to apply to my life.


"When we choose to follow Christ in faith rather than choosing another path out of fear, we are blessed with a consequence that is consistent with our choice." 

- Quentin L. Cook

Life is hardly easy, but our attitudes and actions help whether things can get better or more difficult. Jason and I are far from perfect and we do make mistakes, but we also strive to do our best and follow Jesus Christ. I have personally found I am happier and more at peace when I am doing what is right, knowing that Heavenly Father will bless me and not having fear.

Alyx and Laughing till I cry in RS

Ok, so the first thing . . . . Alyx is 11 months old today. Holy crap, how did the time go by so fast?!?! Honestly, he's still a baby to me, but he's growing out of that as he's being more independent and learning to do more toddler ish things.

Now, yesterday in church, it was kinda hard. Alyx did not really let Jason or I sleep well during the night so poor Jason fell asleep during church and I had to try to get Alyx to sleep during sacrament meeting and sunday school with no success when I was sleep deprived as well. Thankfully, it was Jason's turn taking Alyx  during the final hour so I could actually pay attention in Relief Society. Guess what . . . I was still busy. I was asked to say the prayer, had a quote that I needed to read and had to do a small amount of work in my new calling, (I'm on the RS welcome committee). Besides that, there was a mom sitting in front of me with her adorable 3 month old son. He kept on spitting up on her and himself and so I helped clean up the mess. :) Made me think of Alyx and when he used to do that ALOT! The first two times her son looked at me, I played with him and made him smile and laugh. Then I decided to stop, except he apparently thought I was funny after that, because even without me doing anything, if he looked at me he started laughing so much I started laughing. I laughed so much I was crying and had to put my head down so he wouldn't see my face. After calming down a bit I sat back up and payed attention to the lesson. A few moments later he looked at me again and laughed all over again, making me crack up!! I couldn't help it. It was so funny and so cute, but I couldn't stop laughing and crying. The process happened a few more times until his mom took her son to the back of the room so we would stop laughing. It was good medicine though. :) Just hope my face isn't that funny looking.

The Miracle of Love

Today, was just another ordinary day. Nothing new happened. Nothing exciting or wondrous. But yet I was thinking, yes, quite a shocker, me thinking. ha. ha. ha. No really. In the past week, it might've been one of the scariest weeks in my life. But that and other things got me thinking about the power of love and how it is such a miracle.

No couple, no marriage is perfect. Even if you're totally in love. Things happen. I've seen it in my family's lives, my friend's, even my own. It doesn't even matter if you're married, currently dating someone, or single. Love is a powerful thing.

Love does not erase mistakes or make people forget past hurts.

But it can help ease pain and heal wounds.

For me, love melts anger. Kinda funny but I can be mad at Jason for one reason or another and 5 to maybe 10 minutes later, I just want to curl up in his arms. Or I can be furious, extremely angry with someone then later that same day, cry because I love them so much and just want to help them.

Love is a very strange thing. A very wonderful thing. It can be scary too, especially when the past is so full of mistakes and hurt.

I've seen time after time, someone getting hurt over and over again. But they stick it through because they have endless love for that person, they are dedicated. Even when others have no hope or faith and would have given up already. I know another person who has done crazy and stupid things, but because of love and their unselfishness, their companion has forgiven them, without question.

I'm so happy that I have found love. Through my wonderful husband who sticks by my side, my son who makes me smile everyday, my family, my friends and those who don't even know me show love.

But there is one, my older brother, Jesus Christ. He loves all. There is not one soul that he doesn't love. Even when it feels like you're alone and you think how can he possibly love you . . . it really is true. I have felt his love, he is there and is willing to show you how much he loves you if you let him. He is the biggest miracle of all, and giving us the gift of life with him if we do what is right. If we let his gift of Atonement cover our sins and our pain.

Maybe you'll know this song . . . or the movie it was on. This has touched me ever since I was a little girl. I love this song and fits perfectly with how I want to end things. The pictures are wonderful too.

Faith

A few weeks ago, I had thoughts popping up, in my dreams, while I was reading and just doing normal every day things. Lost and confused as of what to do and if I was really getting them from the Spirit or if it was just me going crazy, I prayed and went to the Temple for help and guidance. There I received my answer and knew what the Lord was wanting me to do. I accepted it and told Jason.


Funny thing, you can get answers from the Lord, but that doesn't make things easier. In the end, we still have our agency of what to do. 


I was a bit unsure of the future but continued on with my life. 


Up until last night I was starting to believe I can do what the Lord has in store for me. I should know by now that Satan is continually working on me. He pulled me down, dragging my thoughts of doubt and my ability to do what my Heavenly Father wants me to do.  After a while I started to pray, pleading for another way to do his will. I felt horrible. A failure and utterly ridiculous. Who am I to ask God if I can change what he wants of me? To have things go my way? I didn't see how I was supposed to do what he wanted of me. I thought there was no way I was to accomplish his will. Finally I fell asleep and later woke up feeling drained and weak. Alone and not sure. 


Continuing on, the outside world fit my mood. Dreary and depressing. Thoughts kept coming to my mind. How am I supposed to do this? I don't think I could really do what is needed of me. Then I remembered a scripture . . .

1 Nephi 3:7

7 And it came to pass that I, Nephi, said unto my father: I will go and do the things which the Lord hath commanded, for I know that the Lord giveth no commandments unto the children of men, save he shall prepare a way for them that they may accomplish the thing which he commandeth them.

Nephi was asked to get the plates, even after King Laban had tried to kill him and his brothers. With faith, he followed the Spirit and did what he needed to do, knowing that the Lord was with him. 


I was tried and tested. Now, when it comes to things that I think are impossible or if I feel inadequate, I need to remember to put my faith in my Father in Heaven. If he wants me to do something, if I do my best, he will give me the strength and help that I need to accomplish the task he asks of me.

Sorry, Lo siento, Sumimasen

So I know I haven't written anything for a while and I apologize. I'll try to give a summary of the past weeks. From returning to Japan, to coming back to the States . . . again, to current day. :)

When returning to Jason, I was a giddy school girl and couldn't stop smiling. A few days after I returned, we went to a HUGE aquarium. It was a lot of fun to see all the animals. I saw a crab climbing up a wall, trying to escape, dolphins doing tricks, sharks of different sizes, a turtle that had its mouth fish's fin and wouldn't let go (super entertaining) and a WHALE SHARK!! We also went on one of the world's largest ferris wheel at night. It was quite romantic. :) Later on that week, it was some kind of holiday/vacation for Japan, so the ward had a talent show. They knew that Jason and I loved dancing and that we showed a preview from our first FHE so they asked if we would dance for the talent show. We said yes. So on Saturday, we danced. Doing swing moves rather fast which was fun. We haven't done some serious dancing ever since I got pregnant so that was like a year ago with no dancing. We were totally out of practice and made some mistakes, but the people in our ward loved it and were super impressed!!! That same night we watched fireworks, and let me say, they were fantastic!! I love fireworks and so does Alyx, so it was quite a special treat. A few days later, I had my first hula lesson from one of the sister missionaries. During our vacation week, we traveled more, saw some Japanese temples/Imperial buildings and had some yummy food that we cooked ourselves in a fancy resturaunt. We bought souvenirs for our family and bought a Ukata for me, which is kinda like a summer kimono except it's not made of silk and so it wasn't too pricey. It is so gorgeous, just wish I knew how to do it all up right. lol.

So those are the highlights that I can remember, but just let me include my last Sunday in Japan. Two weeks earlier, I got a call from a lady who asked me if I would teach the RS lesson before I left. I asked what the topic would be on. She said Eternal Marriage, I asked if I could have some time to think about it and would let her know soon. It was just nerves that made me hesitate but in my heart I knew that I needed to give that lesson. So I accepted. I was scared. Like super terrified. I had only given two other RS lessons in my whole entire life and they were in Utah where they spoke the same language as I did. So this was loads scarier!! Only the sister missionaries and one japanese woman there knew English fluently. All the other women knew a little bit or none at all. So giving that lesson was an adventure. But I felt good after I finished.

Returning home was harder than the first time I left. Knowing I wouldn't see Jason for two weeks and a few days instead of the seven before. I know some of you might roll your eyes or think that those two weeks are nothing and you're probably right. But to Jason and I, it would seem a lot longer than that. We've always been together since we met. Only a few days have we not been together, so it is ridiculously hard for us.

Alyx turned six months old not long after we returned so we celebrated his half birthday. That tradition started from my mom's side of the family, her mom started it with her and I am going to carry that on. Alyx had a little bit of chocolate from a cookie that I had put on my finger. Just a little bit for him to taste. He also started sitting up completely by himself. Another thing he started doing was saying ma ma :) It was soo cute!! Trying to teach him to say da da now. When he turned seven months old, he decided to surprise us with another mile stone. My baby boy started crawling!! It's kinda like a caterpillar crawl, but he's still moving and going places. Time to start baby proofing our new place. lol.

Oh ya . . . also it's not news. But my in-laws are pretty hard core BYU. So when the great game of BYU and U of U came upon us, I was alone in a house full of cougars. But I stayed strong and cheered on my team to victory. Utes crushed them. 54 - 10. Sadness. But hey I think they won so much due to Alyx. lol. I dressed him in a red outfit. ;)

Temples

So in church today, the Relief Society president, Meetani (I know it's not the correct spelling but that's how it's pronounced, so just bear with me), gave an excellent lesson. The topic was on Temples. Wonderful lesson, but it kinda made me homesick for the Bountiful temple. Or one that I can see within a few minutes.

We talked about the ordinances and blessings and how special they are. I was asked when I got sealed to my husband and what I had felt and remembered about that time. It was wonderful to think back on that special day, about getting married and sealed to Jason for time and all eternity. I remember the many angels I felt close by. Both past ancestors and future angels that would come into our family.

Japan doesn't have the wonderful blessings to have many temples like Utah has. The closest is the Tokyo temple which is 8 hours away and the ward has to plan a special trip to go together. Not many people have had the blessing to go to the temple has often as I have. It made me wake up a bit to see how blessed I am. Back in Utah, it only takes a few minutes to get to the temple. It made me feel bad to have not visited the temple more often. When these people here in Osaka clearly would love to go if they could.

When I return home, I'm going to try to go more often again, like I used to with Jason. Before we were married, we used to go every other week to do baptisms. Now we're lucky to go even once a month. Of course we have a baby now, but that shouldn't be an excuse. We could get someone to watch Alyx. We just need to make it more of a priority in our lives.

I'm loving the time I'm in Japan with my husband and son, but I can't wait until we go back home. Back to where we can see one or more temples within a day. Back to where there is peace and love.

Sorry, one more thing about today. I said the prayer in Relief Society and got enough courage to bear my testimony (just in Relief Society though), that was pretty hard, but I've made a few friends there. :)

Turning point . . .

The turning point in my life was on May 17, 2009. The day I met a wonderful RM named Jason Wilber . . .

It was a Sunday that unknowingly had changed my life forever. 

That day I was able to participate in a musical number, "I know that My Redeemer lives". But it wasn't just any ordinary number. Several people had gotten together, to sing it in multiple languages all taking their turns. Can't remember all the languages that they were, but I think there was seven or eight. I and three other people sang part of the verse in Spanish. Who knew what difference that would make? :)

After sacrament meeting, I talked to a few friends and had then wandered out, heading to my Sunday school class. But I didn't get too far before I got a tap on the shoulder, I turned around, and came face to face with a very cute blonde stranger.To my surprise he started speaking rapidly in Spanish. Now even though I said I sang in Spanish earlier, doesn't mean I was fluent. I know enough to read and can understand the gist of what is being said. Once in a while I can even hold conversations in Spanish. But as much as I wanted to know what this cute guy was saying, I didn't. I told him that I was sorry and that I wasn't fluent, just knew a little bit. We got to talking and I couldn't help but to like him, he was funny and very cute. I learned he just came home from his mission in Cordoba, Argentina.

After a few minutes, we had to part ways to go to class. Sadly, I didn't really pay attention to what was being said even though I tried to. All that I could think of was the man I just met. Half way through the class I found myself looking around and interesting enough I found the cute RM on the other side of the room sitting all alone!!! I kicked myself for not looking when I came in the class earlier and could have invited him to sit next to me. But now I was thinking of how I could talk to him and say something to him that wouldn't sound dorky. So I waited until class was over and walked over to him. I remembering saying hi again and asking more about his mission. We talked a bit more. As the room started filling up with men, I knew I had to get to Relief Society. Frantic but trying to remain calm, all I knew was that I loved being around this guy. Remembering about a fireside at the Regional center, I asked him if he would like to go that night. His response was that he couldn't, that he had a friend that had flown over from Vermont (where he's originally from) just to be with him. I understood, but that didn't make the rejection any easier. I nodded and started heading out, when he stopped me and asked for my number. Shocked, I gave it to him and couldn't help but feel a little better as I floated off to Relief Society.

He sent me some texts a couple days later, completely in Spanish and I did my best to respond back without using English. We started hanging out, playing volleyball and going to other church activities. Eventually we went on a few dates and became boyfriend and girlfriend. Another couple months later and we were engaged. :) Almost a year after we had met, we were married in the temple for time and all eternity.

That was almost two years ago. Who knew what that day would do for my future?! :)